


"He is Not My Boyfriend!"

by shownult



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, And Lots of It, Coming Out, Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Happy Ending, Height Differences, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Miscommunication, NCT Dream Ensemble Are Best Friends, READ NOTES, Secret Relationship, Slice of Life, Soft Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Songfic, Sort Of, Swearing, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Zhong Chen Le & Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas Are Brothers, it's better than it sounds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:13:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25906396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shownult/pseuds/shownult
Summary: Renjun and Chenle have undeniably gotten closer this school year. Everyone around them assumes they're together. But Renjun's heart lies elsewhere. Elsewhere being the mess of a human that is Wong Yukhei.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas
Comments: 5
Kudos: 151





	"He is Not My Boyfriend!"

**Author's Note:**

> wow i spent like two whole days on this. i think its the longest one shot i've written so HURRAY! 
> 
> thank you to my friends, maxwell and jordyn, who lowkey hyped me up while i wrote.
> 
> also, here is a playlist of all the songs mentioned https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5KigNUiG7eubdfYmWDM9It?si=IB-fqd7eQPKd9CPhjY1I8w
> 
> things to take note of:
> 
> this story takes place in america, so that’s how the school system is written. it starts around february, after lucas’s bday, so lucas is newly 20, renjun is 18 (a senior), and chenle is 17 (a junior). pretty much everyone’s birthdays line up with their real birthdays, so you can assume the others’ in relativity to the three main characters.
> 
> “-” indicates a time skip, and “//” indicates a flashback.
> 
> tàitai - honorific used toward familiar married women  
> chǔn lǘ - dumbass  
> gae sae kki - son of a bitch  
> -ge - honorific used by males towards older males  
> āyí - formal honorific used towards women around your mother’s age
> 
> (sorry if any of the meanings are off, blame google)
> 
> thank you and enjoy!

_Wednesday_

  
  


“Look who it is, Mr. Chenle’s boyfriend!”, Renjun could hear Jaemin yell as he approached the lunch table.

“For the hundredth time, I’m not dating Chenle.” 

“Oh, but would you look at that shirt you’re wearing? Could’ve sworn I saw Chenle wearing that just last week. How peculiar,” Jaemin gestured to Renjun’s t-shirt, an idiotic smile adorning his face.

“Jaemin: reporting live from other people’s business, as per usual,” Jeno said, earning a grimace from the boy. 

“Shut up, cat boy,” Jaemin spat back, Jeno simply rolling his eyes and going back to looking at his phone.

“Hey, losers,” Chenle said as he took a seat next to Renjun, handing him his lunch.

“And what did our doting Chenle pack for his lovely boyfriend this fine Wednesday?”, Donghyuck asked with a grin equal to Jaemin’s in idioticness.

“None of your business,” Renjun retorted, opening up the lunchbox and taking out the handwritten note.

_“Ain’t got nothing but love babe, Eight days a week.”_

_♪ Eight Days A Week - The Beatles_

_Make sure to drink all of the milk and don’t just eat the chips! I need my baby happy and healthy!_

_\- Your boy_

Renjun smiled as he closed the letter and put it in his pocket, reaching in his backpack to get his earbuds before opening Spotify, adding the song to the playlist titled “旭熙” and pressing the shuffle button. He took out the milk carton and opened it, chugging it all in one go. After taking a picture of the empty milk carton he sent it to the boy in his contacts with a heart next to his name. Minutes later, he received a reply simply reading, “ _good boy <3 _”.

“Chenle, can I go to your’s, after school?”, Renjun asked.

“Yeah, meet me at the usual spot.”

Donghyuck scoffed, “Renjun spends more time at Chenle’s house than he does his own.”

“They’re in their honeymoon stage, let them be,” Jaemin commented, earning another look from Renjun.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Thursday_

  
  


“Hey Chenle, where’s Renjun?”

“Um...I guess he’s not feeling well today,” Chenle responded to Jisung’s question, setting the two lunchboxes in his grip onto the table. “Guess you guys can eat his lunch, I’m going to the bathroom.”

Donghyuck and Jaemin were grabbing the lunchbox before Chenle even finished his sentence. Donghyuck took the shrimp chips and shoved the rest of the food towards Jaemin, who picked up the piece of paper secured to the top of the lunch box with a heart-shaped sticker. He glanced up to make sure Chenle had left before holding up the note, “Guys, Chenle’s daily love letter.”

“Oh my god, open it!”, Donghyuck said, a little too excitedly. 

“Isn’t that a little invasive?”, Jisung said, but Jaemin had already opened it and started reading.

_“In a sky full of stars, I think I saw you.”_

_♪ A Sky Full of Stars - Coldplay_

_I’m really sorry baby. I texted her and made sure she knew I wasn’t interested. I couldn’t sleep last night so I looked up at the night sky and thought of you. I wished I could’ve been holding you in my arms. Call me when you have the chance._

_\- Your boy_

“Looks like they had a lover's quarrel,” Jaemin remarked, passing the piece of paper to Donghyuck to read. 

“You think that’s why Renjun didn’t come to school?”, Jeno asked as Donghyuck finished reading and handed the note to him.

“Probably, but on another note, that letter was sickeningly sweet,” said Jaemin. 

“Wait a minute, this isn’t Chenle’s handwriting,” Jeno interrupted, eyes looking suspiciously down at the paper. “All his assignments are done in chicken scratch, the teachers are always complaining to him about it.”

“Maybe he just tries to write nicely for his boyfriend? I’d assume that he puts more effort into these notes than he does any schoolwork,” Jisung offered.

“Yeah you’re probably right,” Jeno responded, before noticing Chenle walking back towards their table and immediately hiding the note.

  
  


-

  
  


Lucas took a deep breath before knocking on the door. Seconds later, he was greeted by a motherly smile.

“Hello, Yukhei! What can I do for you?”, The woman was wearing an apron and wiping her hands on a kitchen towel. Lucas could smell the Chinese spices radiating off of her.

“Hello, Mrs. Huang. Did Renjun go to school today?”

“No, he wasn’t feeling too well so I let him stay in bed today. Would you like to see him?”

“Yes! I mean, yes please!”, he said with an awkward smile.

“Come on in! I’m making some sweet and sour pork right now, I’ll bring it to you boys when it’s done!” Lucas knew that was Renjun’s favorite dish when he was distressed.

“Thank you Huang-tàitai,” Lucas gave her a smile before going up the stairs, two steps at a time.

When he reached Renjun’s door he hesitated for a second, but ultimately decided on knocking sheepishly on the wood. When there was no response from the inside, he cracked the door open just enough to peek his large head through. Renjun was rolled up in his comforter, facing away from the door. Lucas felt his heart break a little bit.

“Baby?”

The boy looked over and their eyes met. It was obvious the boy had been crying, but of course, he wasn’t going to be vulnerable towards his boyfriend in this situation.

“What are you doing here?”, Renjun asked in a weak voice, trying to act defensively.

“I missed you. And I felt terrible all night,” Lucas took a seat on Renjun’s bed and started to stroke the boy’s hair. He could feel the smaller relax a bit before aggressively moving his head away from Lucas’s hand.

“You should feel terrible. I can’t believe you let her flirt with you right in front of me. I know you aren’t out of the closet yet but that doesn’t mean you can lead girls on. You’re in a relationship Yukhei! Yet you still let her give you her number. You could’ve at least said you have a girlfriend!”, Renjun’s eyes were teary again from getting worked up.

“I texted her that I’m in a relationship and that I’m not interested. And I blocked her number. I won’t let it happen again. I just want you, I need _you._ ” 

He watched Renjun contemplate silently before reaching out and taking Lucas’s hand. Lucas felt better immediately feeling Renjun’s tiny hand inside his grasp.

“I bought you a gift,” Lucas said, pulling out a long rectangular box from his hoodie pocket and setting it in the boy’s hand.

Renjun looked up at Lucas with stars in his eyes. Lucas gave him a reassuring smile, prompting the boy to open the box. Inside was a bracelet, a silver plate connected to a chain. Embossed onto the tiny rectangle of silver was ‘ _WYH♡HRJ’._

Renjun took the bracelet out of the box and looked back up at the taller boy with a gaze full of love. Lucas smiled and pushed up the sleeve of his hoodie to show a matching bracelet in gold.

“Baby,” Renjun had big puppy dog eyes as he looked adoringly at the gold on his wrist. Lucas helped him put the silver bracelet onto the tinier wrist belonging to Renjun. The younger boy stared at the engraved letters for a few seconds, silence filling the room before he finally spoke.

“I’m still mad, and I haven’t fully forgiven you, but I’m going to try to be understanding. Because I need you too,” Renjun said decidedly.

“You’re literally the sweetest boyfriend I could ever ask for,” Lucas said as he laid down to wrap himself around the smaller boy, kissing the top of his head and lingering there as he breathed in the scent of the boy’s shampoo.

But then there was a knock on the door and Lucas shot up, trying (and failing) to look casual as Renjun’s mother walked in with a tray of food. Renjun simply laughed.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Friday_

  
  


Lucas’s note today was short but sweet.

_“We make a really good team, and though not everyone sees,_

_we’ve got this crazy chemistry between us.”_

_♪ for him. - Troye Sivan_

_One day everyone will see._

_\- Your boy_

“Renjun, what’s with that bracelet? You keep staring at it the same way you stare at pictures of corgis,” Jeno is the first to point out.

“Nothing, I just think it’s neat,” Renjun defended.

“Tell him they’re friendship bracelets,” Chenle said to Renjun, in Chinese.

“I can’t believe you guys can just talk shit out loud because none of us can understand. One of these days Jisung, Jeno, Jaem, and I are just going to start speaking in Korean all the time and you’ll be whining for us to speak English,” Donghyuck scoffed.

“Why don’t you try learning Chinese then?”, Renjun said snarkily.

“Why don’t _you_ try learning Korean?”, Donghyuck raised his eyebrows in a classic _I won this argument_ face.

“Chǔn lǘ.”

“Gae sae kki!”

“ANYWAYS,” Jisung The Mediator interjected, “what does the bracelet say?”

“It just has…” He paused for a second, “Chenle and I’s initials. It’s a friendship bracelet, he has the other half.”

“Right... _friendship_ bracelets. So why isn’t Chenle wearing his?”, Jaemin said with narrowed eyes.

Renjun looked at Chenle, silently pleading for him to come up with something. “It’s gold and my chain today is silver. Wouldn’t want them to clash,” Chenle decided on.

“They aren’t a big deal, just something to celebrate our friendship,” Renjun defended. Looking over only to see Jeno holding up his phone with a photo of him and his girlfriend wearing two bracelets that were the exact same as the bracelet on Renjun’s wrist.

“So that was a fucking lie,” Donghyuck chuckled.

“I got the same ones for us, from CouplesJewelry.com,” Jeno said, looking at the two Chinese boys expectedly.

Renjun took a deep breath, “Fine, they’re couples bracelets. But Chenle doesn’t even have the other one, my boyfriend does.”

“Funny how those are the same person,” Jaemin teased.

“They’re not! I have a boyfriend and it’s not Chenle.”

“Sure...and why haven’t we met this _boyfriend_ ,” Donghyuck said, everyone's attention on Renjun.

There weren’t many excuses he could make and the ones he could he knew the boys wouldn’t believe. They all had already decided in their heads that he was dating Chenle, and he couldn’t really blame them. All signs pointed to that as the truth. 

Truth be told, Renjun didn’t like hiding his relationship. It was suffocating at times. The way that when relatives would visit, they’d ask if he was dating anyone, and he had to say no. The way that when Renjun’s parents were home, the two had to act like they were just friends. The way that right now he had to make up an excuse as to why his best friends had never met the man he loves. 

“Have any of you finished the assignment for Physics?” That’s how Renjun decided to respond to the interrogation. By ignoring it.

“I can see the way you’re trying to change the topic, and normally I wouldn’t let it slide but actually I need help on that assignment too so which one of y’all did it?” Renjun giggled at Donghyuck’s response, trying to ignore the aching in his heart.

As usual, Jisung, who’s smart ass was taking the class a year early, was the only one who did the assignment. And as Renjun took pictures of Jisung’s work, he couldn’t stop thinking about a certain tall lanky boy with huge hands and a smile that lights up every room.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Saturday_

  
  


“And that, my friends, is why I’m an only child,” Jeno finished his speech with a clap.

“All that just to tell us that you ate your twin in the womb?” Jisung looked at Jeno exasperatedly whilst wiping Cheeto dust onto his sweatpants.

“Yes. Do you want to hear about my birth now?” Jisung simply threw a Cheeto in response.

“Renjun why haven’t you said anything for the past thirty minutes. Are you playing Subway Surfer again? We already had an addiction intervention, don’t tell me you relapsed,” Jaemin said, with a pointed look on his face.

“No, I’m texting my boyfriend.”

“Oh, could you ask him to bring me a cookie when his shift is over?”, Jisung asked nonchalantly.

“My boyfriend is not Chenle!”

“Whatever you say, and while you’re at it, ask him if he can come to the party tomorrow,” Donghyuck chimed in.

“Wait, that’s tomorrow? I have a date tomorrow,” Renjun said. He really isn’t good at scheduling things.

“That’s fine, us singles...and Jeno...will have fun while you go smooch with your boyfriend.” Jaemin said snarkily.

Renjun frowned and looked back down at his phone to see a new text from Yukhei, telling him to be ready at 5pm. His frown instantly disappeared.

But when Donghyuck texted Chenle about the party later that night, he accepted. No mention of a date.

  
  


-

  
  


“What are you smiling at Lucas?”

Lucas had been looking at his phone, messages app open to text Renjun. When he looked up, Mark, Hendery, and Dejun were all looking right back at him.

“Just...saw a tweet. You guys probably wouldn’t find it funny.”

“I would’ve thought you were texting a chick. You know, Yerim has been asking about you, I think she’s interested,” Hendery mentioned passively, but even hearing the name Yerim was like a punch to the gut.

“Yeah...she gave me her number the other day,” Lucas confessed, the image of Renjun cuddled up in bed, eyes red from crying filled his head.

“Deadass? You hit the jackpot!”, Dejun said, smiling. Lucas wasn’t smiling.

“I’m not really interested.”

“Are you kidding? Dude, every guy in the world would want to date her, unless they were gay or something. Which is cool, equal rights, bro!”, Mark commented. Lucas knew he wasn’t gay. He had dated girls his whole life and he did genuinely have feelings towards them. But he also has feelings for a certain high school senior that looks up at him with round doe eyes, and is very much not a girl. Lucas knew that if he came out to his friends, they wouldn’t care. But he couldn’t help but want to keep it to himself. He wants to be out to as few people as possible for now.

“I’m gonna go take a piss, be right back,” Lucas said trying to sound casual whilst he quickly walked to the bathroom.

After closing the door, he let himself slump to the floor with a sigh. Taking out his phone, he saw a new text from Renjun. It was a selfie of him, holding his friend’s cat. He could see the bracelet on the boy’s arm. Suddenly, he felt that everything would be okay.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Sunday_

  
  


“This ice cream is so fucking good,” Renjun was licking at a chocolate ice cream cone. Lucas looked over to see that the boy in the passenger seat had gotten chocolate all over his mouth. He couldn’t help it when he leaned over the center console and held Renjun’s chin between his thumb and pointer finger, kissing him and tasting the sweet ice cream. He continued to savor the feeling of soft lips against his until said lips yelped and pulled away. When Lucas opened his eyes, he saw his boyfriend looking down at his t-shirt that now had a scoop of chocolate ice cream on it.

“You made me drop it!”, Renjun whined as he held the shirt up and tried to eat the ice cream off of it. 

“Sorry! I couldn’t help it,” Lucas said, handing him napkins. “Take off your shirt.”

“Well if you wanted to have sex you could’ve just s-”

“You know I didn’t mean that!”, Lucas yelled playfully at Renjun, who was already taking off the shirt, before grabbing the sweatshirt in the backseat and handing it to his boyfriend. “You left this in here last time you seduced me in this car, you horny bastard.”

“Thank you,” Renjun sing-songed, ignoring the second part of what Lucas said. “My friends saw me wearing this shirt last week. They had seen Chenle in it and they used that to fuel their ‘Renle’ agenda.”

“Little bitch is always stealing my clothes.” Lucas paused after speaking, staring in thought at Renjun as he put on the new shirt. “I’m sorry, baby.”

“Oh no, what did you do?”, Renjun stared accusingly at the taller boy.

“Nothing! I’m just sorry that you can’t tell anyone about me. That you have to hide our relationship from them,” Lucas apologized with his usual doting gaze towards the boy.

“Baby,” Renjun started, looking at Lucas sweetly before taking one of his big hands and holding it, “I’d do anything for you, I promise it’s okay. You don’t have to apologize.”

“I do though! You’re out and proud and should be able to tell people about your boyfriend, but you can’t just because I’m a loser who doesn’t want anyone to know that I’m not straight. You deserve better.”

Renjun responded by holding the taller boy’s face with both hands, kissing him deeply. Lucas felt a warmth sink through his entire body. Renjun pulled away only to stare deeply into Lucas’s wide black eyes.

“How could I deserve better when you’re already the best?”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Monday_

  
  


“Renjun, over here!”, Chenle yelled to him from across the court. He jerked himself away from Jeno and swiftly passed the ball, Chenle proceeding to run up to the net, making a slam dunk and hanging by the rim for a few seconds before dropping to the ground. 

“Jaemin you are a useless defense,” Jeno scolded, annoyed at the way Chenle and Renjun were absolutely destroying them in their weekly basketball game. 

“Fuck off Lee!”

“Well, I guess there’s no need for me to say that Chenle and Renjun won,” Jisung, the designated referee, announced. The youngest watched as the two Chinese boys celebrated and Jeno tried to beat Jaemin up. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a glint of silver on the floor of the court. He walked over and picked it up, inspecting it. It took him a few seconds to realize that it was Renjun’s couple bracelet. He squinted his eyes and read the engravement, ‘ _WYH♡HRJ’._ Jisung frowned, contemplating what it meant before ultimately deciding he didn’t care.

“Renjun, you dropped your bracelet!”, Jisung yelled to him from across the court. Renjun jogged over, thanking him and attempting to hug the younger boy, who rejected the sweaty embrace.

“Why is Chenle still not wearing the other one? I mean not wearing it for a day is understandable but I’ve yet to see you wear it,” Jaemin points out, rubbing his ribcage that had just been kicked by an angry Jeno.

“Maybe because I’m not his boyfriend?”, Chenle stopped drinking his water to say.

“You keep saying that but look at the material! You aren’t fooling anyone so you might as well just wear it,” Jaemin gave him one of his signature snide looks.

Chenle rolled his eyes and ignored him in favor of addressing Renjun. “Jun, we gotta leave soon if we wanna eat dinner while it’s still hot, my mom is making Ma Po Tofu.”

Jaemin, in his best Chenle impression, says, “ _I’m not dating Renjun! Hey, Renjun, let me drive you to my house to eat food and make out!_ ”

“Is that really how my voice sounds?”, Chenle asks, staring frightenedly at the rest of the boys.

  
  


-

  
  


“Hello, my boys! You are just in time. Renjun dear, could you go wake up Yukhei?”, Mama Wong greeted them, setting plates of steaming hot food onto the dining table.

“Of course.” Renjun was immediately on his way up the stairs, suppressing a grin.

When Renjun walked into the older boy’s room, he stood next to his bed for a moment, admiring the sleeping figure. His mouth was open slightly and his hair was messy from the pillow. Renjun noticed that he had his earbuds in and curiously picked up the boy’s phone. The home screen showed that he was listening to a playlist titled ‘ _renjun_ ’. 

“Hello, my sleeping beauty,” Renjun said through a smile, jumping onto the bed to jostle him into consciousness. Lucas blinked up at him before puckering his lips, asking for a kiss. Renjun indulged him and leaned down to softly press their lips together. “It’s dinnertime baby, get your tall ass out of bed.”

Lucas complained a bit but with a few more kisses and the mention of tofu, Renjun was able to convince him to come down to the dining room. Chenle, of course, had already started eating. And Lucas, of course, fed all of the walnuts in his bowl to Renjun. Ms. Wong looked at them fondly.

“Mom stop being jealous of two teenage boys, you’ve been married twice and divorced both times. Your dating days are long gone,” Chenle commented, earning him a smack on the arm.

“Might I remind you, if I hadn't remarried you wouldn’t exist, Zhong Chenle,” the mother spoke pointedly.  
  


“Oh how I wish it would’ve played out that way,” Lucas snickered from across the table. 

“I do so much for you, and this is what I get in return?”

“Please enlighten me Chenle, what exactly do you do for me?”

“I bring Renjun your stupid lunches, drive him over here, cover for you two whenever Renjun slips up.”

“All of those things involve Renjun, I’m asking what you do for _me._ ”

“Maybe I’d do more things for you if you weren’t such an asshole.”

“BOYS!” Ms. Wong interrupted, “Stop bickering, we have a lovely guest who deserves a peaceful dinner.”

“He is lovely,” Lucas said, rubbing Renjun’s thigh with his large hand and looking over at the blushing boy.

Chenle threw a piece of tofu at his brother.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Tuesday_

  
  


Renjun woke up embraced in the warm arms of his boyfriend with soft music playing in the earbuds he was sharing with him. He turned over to face the boy, admiring him as the familiar song played.

_“Talking like we used to do. It was always me and you.”_

Renjun thought back to when he and Lucas first met. Renjun had gotten a job at the bakery in the town next to his. 

  
  


//

  
  


“Hi, I’m the new part-timer!” Renjun greeted the lady who was getting the shop ready for opening. 

“Hello, I’m Sarah, I’m the manager here. Is this your first day?”

“Yes ma’am, my name is Renjun. Sorry, it’s a bit hard to pronounce.”

“Please, call me Sarah,” she smiled, gesturing for the boy to follow her as she walked towards the kitchen. When they walked in he was met with a tall boy, at least five inches taller than him and devastatingly handsome.

“This is Lucas, he will be teaching you everything you need to know. I’ll be outside cleaning if you need anything.”

The boy, Lucas, gave him a smile that stretched across nearly his whole face as Sarah left the kitchen. 

“Nice to meet you.”

“N-nice to meet you too.” Renjun cursed himself for stuttering, his usual aloof and sarcastic front crumbling before his eyes. “My name is Renjun, you can call me Jun if it’s too hard to pronounce.”

“Renjun...are you Chinese?”

“Yes! I was born in China, moved here as a toddler!” Renjun was getting a little worked up talking to the long tan and handsome man before him. 

“Then you can call me Yukhei or Xuxi, those are my Chinese names. My mother is Chinese and my father is Thai _and_ I grew up here in America so...I have a few different names.”

“Okay, Xuxi-ge...you are older than me, right? I turned eighteen a few months ago.”

“I’m nineteen, but you don’t have to use honorifics.” The older boy’s smile looked so kind.

Renjun had felt drawn to him from the start.

  
  


-

  
  


“Good morning, my favorite boy,” Lucas greeted him as he walked into the kitchen, tying his apron. 

“I missed you at work yesterday, Yukhei,” Renjun said with a pout. Lucas approached him and pulled him into a loving hug.

“Sorry, baby,” he gave the shorter boy a brief kiss on the top of his head.

The two had been constantly flirting for the past two months. Renjun didn’t want to rush things, having only recently got out of a relationship, but being around Lucas was invigorating. The man was like a human 5-hour Energy, a happy virus that infected everyone around him. Renjun couldn’t help but get addicted to the feeling. And he wished that one day he would be able to call the boy his.

  
  


//

  
  


Current day Renjun felt the same exact way. Even as he simply looked over at the boy in bed with him, he felt a rush of warm happiness settle within his body.

_“Well hold on, my darling._

_This mess was yours, now your mess is mine.”_

  
  


//

  
  


“Would you do me the absolute honor of being my boyfriend?”

“Yes! Holy shit, yes, a thousand times yes!” Renjun was thrilled. He threw his arms around Lucas’s neck and stood on his tippy toes to capture the other boy’s lips. Lucas leaned down to accommodate Renjun’s height, and as they stood there in the bakery’s kitchen, they could feel each other smiling into the kiss.

“There’s something I should tell you though,” Lucas interrupted the moment.

“What is it?”

“I’m not out of the closet. My family knows I’m bisexual, but nobody else does. And if it’s okay with you, I’d like to keep it that way for a little bit longer.”

Renjun paused, letting what Lucas said marinate in his mind. “So...you don’t want me to tell anyone we’re together?”

“Yes, pretty much. God, it sounds awful now that I say it out loud. I’m sorry for ev-”

“No, Yukhei, no!” Renjun cupped the older boy’s cheeks and smiled. “If you aren’t ready, you aren’t ready. For you, I’d wait a million years.”

Lucas embraced him in response, letting his head rest on the short boy’s shoulder.

“Thank you.” Lucas’s voice sounded so fragile, so raw. “You are amazing.”

Renjun pulled away to look Lucas in the eye.

“So are you.”

  
  


//

  
  


Little did he know, Lucas still wouldn’t be ready to come out after dating for seven months. Renjun didn’t want to be upset. He hated himself for being upset. But he couldn’t help but feel that the boy was ashamed of their relationship. That it was some dirty little secret.

But then he watched the lanky boy breathe steadily, naked chest rising and falling smoothly. This was his Yukhei.

He’s glad that at least Lucas had told his family about him. He wasn’t hiding from everyone. The world is a scary place, and he’s valid in not wanting to fully put himself out there.

_“Bring me to your house. Tell me sorry for the mess._

_Hey, I don’t mind.”_

  
  


//

  
  


“Are you excited? First time meeting the fam!”, Lucas was looking excitedly at the boy in the passenger seat. He had driven them from work to his house in the suburbs, the driveway of which they were currently parked in.

“Yes?”

“You don’t sound too sure about that.” Renjun could feel Lucas’s eyes on him as he took a deep breath. Lucas took his hand before responding. “Don’t be scared, my mother already loves you from me talking about you. And my brother, well...he doesn’t let me talk to him about my relationships...but he’s your age and I think you two will get along. Hopefully.”

“Okay, yeah...let’s go in?” 

Lucas smiled as he led Renjun up the stairs of their porch, fingers intertwined and arms swinging as they walked together. Lucas gave Renjun a quick kiss on the lips before opening the door.

“Mama! I’m home!”

A middle-aged lady suddenly appeared, scurrying towards the pair with a smile identical to Lucas’s plastered on her face.

“You must be Renjun! It’s so lovely to meet you!” Renjun could sense the adoration in her tone and felt the knot in his stomach loosen a bit. “Come here sweetie, you can sit anywhere you’d like!” She gestured to the table surrounded by four chairs in the middle of the room. “Dinner will be ready in just a little while.”

Lucas pulled out a chair for Renjun, a dopey smile on his face as the boy blushed and sat down, Lucas proceeding to sit in the chair next to him. 

“She’s making an elaborate hot pot meal just for the occasion. She’s been looking forward to meeting you.”

“Way to make me feel even more pressured, babe,” Renjun said stiffly.

“C’mon! You are the most charming boy ever!” Lucas turned to face him and rubbed his tense shoulders. “She will love you, my prince.”

Before Renjun could respond, a loud voice was heard from the kitchen. 

“Chenle! Quit playing Animal Crossing and come help me set the table!”

‘ _Huh,_ ’ Renjun thought, ‘ _I have a friend named Chenle who loves Animal Crossing. Wait a sec-’_

“RENJUN?!”

“Chenle?!”

“Oh my god, you are dating my fucking brother!?”

Lucas’s eyes glanced back and forth between the two same-aged boys, assessing the situation.

“How was I supposed to know? You haven’t had any of us over!” Renjun was quite frankly flabbergasted. How could his little twerp of a friend be related to the literal gift from Heaven that is Wong Yukhei?

“What’s all this ruckus about?”, Ms. Wong interrupted, setting a large pot in the center of the table.

“Apparently these two know each other?”, Lucas explained, gesturing towards the boys who were still looking at each other with matching shocked faces.

“We’ve been friends since his Freshman year, he never even told me he had a brother!” Renjun looked at Lucas frustratedly. “By the way Ms. Wong, this looks delicious,” Renjun took a break from freaking the fuck out to say.

“Thank you, dear.” The two shared a moment where the mother looked at him dotingly and Renjun looked back with flushed cheeks and bright eyes. The moment, however, was shattered a certain shrieking 16-year-old.

“I can’t believe my brother is having sex with you!”

“Zhong Chenle!”, the mother scolded while Lucas and Renjun both sat awkwardly, blushing at the comment.

“We haven’t...It’s only been three months.” Lucas was bright red, and Renjun would’ve laughed at him if he wasn’t equally as flustered.

“I swear to god Yukhei if you corrupt my Renjun-”

“Let’s start eating, shall we!?”

//

  
  


Renjun laughed at the memory, causing the sleeping boy to stir. When he opened his eyes, they were immediately met with Renjun’s own.

“You’re so beautiful,” was the first thing the boy said, reaching out to push Renjun’s hair out of his face.

‘ _He’s worth it,’_ Renjun thought. The last line of the song played in the earbuds they were still sharing.

_“Your mess is mine.”_

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Wednesday_

  
  


Renjun was in AP Psych, but he wasn’t paying attention to anything the teacher was saying. Hidden within his textbook sat the note Lucas had put in his lunch today. Renjun stared at it, reading it over and over as the song he quoted played in the single AirPod he had in his ear, covered by his hand so no one could see.

_“I’m so in love with you, and I hope you know._

_Darling, your love is more than worth its weight in gold.”_

_♪ Say You Won’t Let Go - James Arthur_

_This song came on the radio last night when I was driving home from work. I got kind of lost in the lyrics. When he sang ‘I’m gonna love you ‘til my lungs give out’ I thought, wow, that’s exactly how I feel about you._

_\- Your boy_

He let himself get lost in the lyrics as well, getting caught up in daydreams about growing old with Yukhei by his side. Suddenly there was a hand waving in front of his face. He looked up to see Donghyuck staring at him expectedly.

“Hello? Dude, I’ve been trying to get your attention for like two whole minutes. Where the hell is your mind?” Renjun’s mind was in a wonderful place, filled with love and images of his favorite boy in the world. But he wouldn’t say that out loud.

“I don’t know, anywhere but this lesson,” he said looking up at the teacher.

“Anyways, your boyfriend invited us to hang out at his place after school. You didn’t respond in the group chat but I assume he already told you?”

Renjun swiped down to look at his notifications, and sure enough, there was a text from Chenle asking who wanted to hang at his house. Chenle rarely had any of their friend group over, bar Renjun. Before this school year, he had never had any of them over. After his parents divorced and his father moved out, he slowly started letting them spend time there. He can clearly remember the first time the other boys had visited. The way Lucas introduced himself to them all as Chenle’s stepbrother, pretending to be meeting Renjun for the first time.

  
  


//

  
  


“Okay boys, I’m Lucas, the unfortunate older brother to this little bitch.” He watched as his boyfriend grabbed the shorter brother’s head and pushed it away from him. “Our mother isn’t home so I’m in charge of watching over you all. I’m gonna be up in my room with my headphones on, so be as loud as you want. Just don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” he winked playfully at them, but Renjun caught his gaze and understood that it was meant for him. He let his eyes linger on Lucas before looking up as he sipped the Coke he had taken from the fridge.

After the lanky brother went up to his room, Jaemin dived straight into his usual antics. “You didn’t tell us your brother is fucking hot!”

Renjun choked on his drink, spitting it all over his jeans.

“And he’s tall! If I were you, I would’ve been all, ‘ _What are you doing, Step-Bro?_ ’”

“Oh my fucking god that is the most disgusting thing you have ever said. I swear I will kick you out of this house.” Chenle looked traumatized.

“Chenle, can I borrow some pants? Mine are covered in Coke now, thanks to Jaemin.”

“Yeah, my room is upstairs,” Chenle told Renjun, acting as if the boy didn’t already know.

When he reached the top of the stairs he paused in front of Lucas’s door before deciding, ‘ _better not,_ ’ and going into Chenle’s room. He immediately peeled the soiled jeans off and threw them into the laundry bin in the corner, making a mental note to take them back next time he came over. Looking down, he realized the soda had seeped through the denim and drenched his briefs. He contemplated taking some from Chenle, before cringing at the idea and opting to just go commando. Just until he got home. But right as he was gripping the waistband to pull them down, the door swung open and he jumped slightly before meeting the eyes of Lucas. The boy leaned against the door frame and stared him up and down with a smirk.

“I like the view, babe.” 

“What the hell are you doing, Yukhei?”

“I heard some noise. Had to make sure there wasn’t any tom-foolery going on.” The older boy entered the room and went up to Renjun, leaning down to pull him into a mind-numbing kiss. Renjun forgot his surroundings for a second until he felt the wetness on his thighs and pulled away abruptly, their lips making a loud smacking noise as they disconnected.

“I’m in my underwear!”

“Wouldn’t be the first time I saw it,” he teased the flustered boy before kissing him again.“I’ve been wanting to do that ever since you walked through the door.”

Renjun smiled so big his eyes disappeared and the skin around them wrinkled.

“Why were you undressing in my little brother’s room though?”

“I got Coke on my jeans, came up to steal some of Chenle’s. Turns out it got on my underwear too. Definitely not gonna wear a pair of his though.”

“You could come to my room and change into some of mine.”

“As much as I appreciate the sentiment, yours would be way too big on me.” Renjun took the moment to glance back and forth between their bodies. While Renjun had narrow shoulders, Lucas’s were broader than the largest ocean on Earth. Renjun’s arms were slim while Lucas’s were large, muscles obvious even when they just sat at his sides. Renjun had plain, standard legs, but Lucas’s went on for miles. And Renjun had slim hips, contrasting the wide hips of Lucas that complimented his well-toned abdomen. 

Renjun loved the way he looked wearing Lucas’s shirts, sleeves falling past his fingertips, and the bottom falling below his crotch. Renjun can’t wear Lucas’s pants though. Trust him, he’s tried. The only pants of his he could wear being sweatpants with drawstrings that he could pull tightly to accommodate his tiny waist.

He had gotten caught up in admiring their size difference when suddenly he realized the implications of Lucas’s previous offer.

“You just wanted to get me in your bedroom, pervert!” 

“I plead the fifth! All of the fifths!”

“You’re going to have to try harder than that if you want to get in my pants.”

“Oh really,” Lucas said playfully, squatting down and wrapping his hands around both of Renjun’s bare thighs, picking the boy up and walking towards his own room. 

“Put me down!”, Renjun whisper-yelled, swatting at broad shoulders, but he was smiling nevertheless. When they reached the boy’s room, Lucas set him on the bed, hands never leaving the thighs in his grasp. 

“How’s that for ‘ _trying harder’_?”

“Shut up,” Renjun muttered through a toothy grin, pulling Lucas’s face down and kissing him sensually, hands moving to rub at the vast expanse of the older boy’s back as he licked into his mouth.

He could hear music playing from the headphones laying on the bed next to his head. He listened to the soft guitar as Lucas kissed his neck.

“ _From the nape of her neck, he made his descent.”_

His breath hitched as Lucas lifted the boy’s shirt and kissed his way down his torso, pulling off the wet briefs and throwing them across the room. 

“ _Like sternum to button, lined lip pinches in between.”_

Lucas navigated back up to Renjun’s face, whispering a declaration of love before meeting their lips. 

“Renjun, are you okay up there?!”, Chenle yelled up the stairs.

Renjun’s eyes opened wide and he pushed the boy off of him, yelling back, “Yeah, just a minute!” He sprung off of the bed and ran towards the dresser, grabbing a pair of sweatpants and quickly putting them on to cover his naked lower half. “I can’t believe I let you seduce me, you conniving fiend!”

Lucas just smiled and watched as the boy tightened the pants and scurried towards the door. Renjun paused for a moment at the door, looking back at the older boy. “By the way, what is that song called?”, he asked, pointing to Lucas’s headphones.

Lucas picked them up and held them to his ear before answering. “It’s called Warm Foothills by alt-J.”

“...Is it about going down on someone or is that just me being dirty-minded.”

“Oh, it’s definitely about going down on someone.”

Renjun scoffed, closing the door behind him and jogging down the steps. He made sure to add that song to his Yukhei playlist.

  
  


//

  
  


“Yeah, I’ll come after I finish my homework.” Renjun smiled at Donghyuck who smiled right back.

Renjun wouldn’t let himself be seduced by Lucas this time around.

  
  


-

  
  


Renjun had just opened the door to Chenle’s place when it happened. He felt long arms sweep him off his feet and carry him bridal style into the house.

“How’s my baby doing today?” Lucas’s voice boomed through the room, before making eye contact with Renjun’s entire friend group. Everyone was staring at the two with shocked expressions. Lucas set the boy down abruptly and chuckled nervously. “Chenle! Didn’t know we had company…”

He was met with silence that lingered for a good five seconds before Jeno broke it.

“Wait, _you’re_ Renjun’s boyfriend?”

Before Renjun could respond, Lucas started yelling defensively.

“No! No, I’m straight! Why would I be dating Renjun?”

Renjun winced. He felt anger build up inside and responded before anyone else could.

“You know what, Yukhei? Fuck you.”

Lucas looked at him with eyes as wide as they could open.

“Are you so fucking ashamed to be dating me that you can’t even let my best friends know? Do you think they’ll hate you for being with a guy? Well guess what? _I_ hate you,” Renjun regretted the words right as they came out, but he couldn’t hold himself back. “I hate you for making me hide my love for you because you’re so afraid of being looked down upon by a few stupid fucking homophobes.”

The silence from before had returned to the room. Everyone was staring at Renjun in astonishment. Renjun could feel his eyes stinging with unshed tears. He ran out of the door and got into his car before anyone could see him cry. He hated showing weakness, even to his friends.

He gripped the steering wheel and let his head fall, tears rolling down his face and hiccups making their way out as he suppressed the urge to sob. When he lifted his head up, he saw shiny silver upon his wrist through his teary eyes. He ripped the bracelet off and threw it out the window of his car. In the back of his head, he knew he was being over-emotional. But for once, he didn’t want to hold his emotions back. They had been bubbling up ever since the two had started dating. They were at the point where they were filled to the brim, threatening to overflow at any moment. And Renjun let them.

As he pulled out of the driveway, he could see Lucas standing on the porch in his peripheral vision. But he pretended that he didn’t.

Lucas felt a smack on the back of his neck and heard Chenle speak from beside him. “You really fucked up.”

“Yeah...I did.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_ Thursday _

  
  


“Renjun staying home today?” Jisung asked Chenle as he sat down at the lunch table, two lunchboxes in his grip.

“Yeah,” Chenle ran his fingers through his hair with a sigh.

“Your brother is such an asshole for that.” Jaemin shook his head.

“In his defense, he told Renjun they would have to hide their relationship before they started dating,” Chenle countered.

“Still, his tone when he said, ‘ _Why would I be dating Renjun?_ ’ I would’ve snapped too,” Jaemin scowled, having been pissed off on his friend’s behalf since the incident. “Lemme see what that fucker said.” Jaemin grabbed the lunchbox meant for Renjun before anyone could stop him.

“Jaemin, it really isn’t our business.” Jisung looked on with a solemn expression, but Jaemin was already opening it and ripping the stationary out.

“ _At night when the stars light up my room, I sit by myself,_

_talking to the moon, trying to get to you.”_

_♪ Talking to the Moon - Bruno Mars_

_I doubt you’re reading this, but if for some reason you are, just remember that I love you. You give me the strength I need. You are the only person who can make me feel this way. With you by my side, I’m willing to face my fears._

_\- Your boy_

“Wow, a Bruno Mars song. Very original,” Jaemin scoffed.

“I heard Lucas crying in his room last night,” Chenle said. “I don’t think I’ve witnessed him crying since we were kids.”

“Damn,” Jeno commented. A somber mood fell over the boys.

“I think it’s best for us to just sit back and let them solve the problem themselves.”

“Wow, Donghyuck being the logical one for once!”

Jeno got a smack to the back of his head for that one.

  
  


-

  
  


Renjun had been in bed since the events of the previous day. He wrapped himself in blankets and let himself wallow in his thoughts for longer than he should have. Because now he felt even worse than before. He needed a distraction.

He started to scroll through TikTok mindlessly. But he found himself going to send the funny ones to Lucas, having to stop himself. That was enough for him to get him to turn off his phone, ignoring the texts and missed calls from his friends and Lucas. 

His next idea was to lose himself in a good book. He got up for the first time in almost 24 hours and walked over to his bookshelf, scanning all his options. His gaze fell upon a Chinese poetry book his father had gifted him for Chinese New Year. He took it out and settled back into bed, flipping to a random page and starting to read.

_Spring by Mu Dan_

_A green flame wavers on the grass,_

_longing to embrace you, flower._

_A flower struggles out of the ground,_

_whether the warm breeze brings sorrow or joy._

_If you are a lass, look up_

_and see how beautiful is your scarlet desire_

Renjun slammed the book shut and tossed it onto his bed. Could he not do a single thing without thinking about Lucas?

He started to get angry. Angry with himself for letting things come to this.

Before he could think any longer, his mother walked in with a mug of Jasmine tea. Her eyes assessed the boy in bed. He had puffy eyes and unkempt hair, still in the same clothes as yesterday. She set the mug down and cupped her son’s cheek with one of her boney hands.

“Your birthday’s coming up. I would hate for you to be in bed on your special day.”

“I’ll try to get up. I’m trying.”

“I know you are, my poor boy.” She paused before continuing. “Will you tell me what’s bothering you?”

“It’s nothing. It’s stupid.” He figured his mother could see through his lies.

“Okay, if you need anything let me know,” was the last thing she said before leaving the room, Renjun now alone once again.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Friday_

  
  


Renjun, being the good son he was, offered to go to the local Chinese Grocery in place of his mother, earning a kiss on the cheek from the grateful woman.

As Renjun drove along the familiar streets he turned on the radio and turned the volume up high, hoping the music would be louder than his thoughts.

The Beatles were suddenly filling the car with a melody that Renjun knew all too well.

_“She’s so glad, she’s telling all the world that her baby buys her things. You know, he buys her diamond rings, you know, she said so. She’s in love with me and I feel fine.”_

As he sat at a red light, Renjun imagined what it would be like to tell all the world about his baby. To brag about the sweet things he does and how handsome he is. He would be able to show off his silver bracelet with their initials on it.

His silver bracelet. The one he threw out the window, never to be seen again. He let his head slump forward against the wheel in anguish, jumping when he accidentally sounded his horn. He turned to the car next to him and bowed slightly, face red with embarrassment. 

Thankfully, the lingering humiliation made him lose his previous train of thought. That was until he pulled into the parking lot and saw Lucas leaning against the wall next to the sliding doors. He was with a boy just a few inches shorter than him, licking at a popsicle despite the fact that it was just over 20℉. Renjun recognized him as Hendery, one of the boys in the pictures Lucas showed him from high school. The two of them had attended a private school about two cities over. Chenle didn’t want to go to said school, hence him being in school with Renjun.

Renjun’s initial instinct was to hide, but then the āyí who ran the store appeared. Renjun couldn’t hear them, but it was obvious they were being scolded. He laughed slightly as the two tall, intimidating boys bowed repeatedly to the short, stout woman.  
  


He watched as they both walked with their heads down towards the sidewalk, heading North on the street. Renjun let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding once Lucas was out of his sight. He was sure that if the boy had made eye contact with him, he would’ve broken down right there. But he forced himself out of the car and into the store, grocery list in hand.

Before checking out, he made sure to grab one of the popsicles he had seen Lucas with.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_A week later_

  
  


“Guys, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you all.” Lucas suddenly was the center of all his friends’ attention.

“‘Sup?” Mark scrunched his round eyebrows.

“I’ve been in a relationship with someone since summer.” Here goes nothing. “He’s a boy.”

“That’s great, dude!” Dejun was the first to speak after just a few seconds of comprehending the words.

“Yeah...I mean we’re happy for you if you’re happy,” Hendery added, taking a sip of the White Claw he was holding.

“I am happy. He’s amazing. But he’s pretty mad at me right now.”

“What did you do, idiot?”, Mark sneered.

“Well...it’s because I didn’t want to tell you guys. I didn’t want to tell anyone. About us. Honestly, I came to terms with my sexuality a hot minute ago, but y’know. There was a stigma at our high school about gay people. Remember that kid...Roger?”

They all nodded. Roger had been harassed for being gay. There was a hostility many of the conservative boys held towards him. Being a private school, it was filled with rich white boys who were raised a certain way. Raised to have certain beliefs. Well, prejudices more so than beliefs. The boy, Roger, got jumped by a group of boys from the lacrosse team. His family sued the boys’ families, and even though he transferred to another district, it got spread around that he was now in a wheelchair.

“The world is a fucked up place, man,” Dejun said. “Especially in this hell hole they call Wisconsin.”

“Exactly...I guess I let my fear of rejection overshadow my fear of losing him,” Lucas said, staring at the floor. “I don’t know if I lost him, but knowing I hurt him so deeply...was a total wake up call. Hence why I’m coming out to you guys.”

“Well, I’m sure I’m speaking on everyone’s behalf when I say that we’re grateful you told us. And I hope everything works out with your boo.” Hendery was slightly buzzed at this point, but the sincerity of his words could be felt by everyone. 

“And if it does, you better let us meet him!”, Dejun added.

Lucas smiled, “I will.”

  
  
  


-

  
  


_Friday_

  
  


Renjun heard a knock on his door and held his breath for a moment, before his father spoke up.

“Son? Can I come in?”

“Yes,” he responded, voice coming out weaker than intended.

Renjun watched the short man make his way to sit next to him on his bed. He closed his eyes and sighed as he felt a hand on his forehead. When Renjun opened them, he was met with a concerned face.

“I know you wouldn’t tell your mother what was wrong, but I was hoping you could tell me. Y’know, man-to-man.”

Renjun’s father was a sweet man. He treasured his relationship with his son and tried his hardest to make Renjun feel comfortable confiding in him.

“It’s about a boy,” Renjun admitted. “I’ve been dating someone.”

“Why didn’t you tell us, Jun?”

“The boy...he isn’t out of the closet.” The elder man nodded along. “He asked me to keep our relationship a secret, which I was willing to do! But it’s been like...eight months.”

His father listened intently, hand now resting on Renjun’s shoulder.

“Yesterday I snapped on him. I can’t stop thinking about it. I feel awful.”

Renjun looked up, seeing the man deep in thought.

“Tell me about him.”

“What?”

“Tell me about this boy.” There was a paternal smile on his face.

Renjun took a beat to gather his thoughts. God, where does he begin?

“I met him at my job at the bakery this past summer. He’s half-Chinese, tall, charming. His smile is infectious. He cares for me. He brings me lunch every day, gives me gifts, and he looks at me like I’m his whole world.”

“Sounds like he loves you, son.”

“He does, and I love him back. But...it’s so hard not being able to tell my friends. Not being able to touch him when we go out together. It’s like being in the closet all over again.” Renjun sighed again before continuing. “But at the same time, I know how scary it is to come out. And I don’t want to pressure him if he’s not ready. I feel like yesterday I was guilt-tripping him. And I want to apologize, but I can’t bring myself to talk to him.”

“Renjun,” his father began, words dripping with wisdom. “Love is...complicated. For everyone. You hurt him, but he hurt you too. Lovers hurt each other sometimes. You’ve witnessed your mother and I fight, but we both love each other dearly. When you share such a deep connection with someone, you have to communicate. I know it’s hard for you. I know that you don’t like showing vulnerability. But you have to learn to speak to him about what you’re feeling. That’s the only way to avoid things like this.”

Renjun gave him a frail smile.

“I think I need a little more time.”

“Take as much time as you need. If he loves you, he will wait.”

“Renjun, dear? Chenle is here!”, his mother called up the stairs. 

Renjun sighed, not in the mood to see the brother of the man he couldn’t get out of his head.

His father, sensing his hesitance spoke warmly. “You should go spend some time with him.”

Renjun grudgingly got out of bed and went downstairs, finding Chenle smiling by his door, holding up a carry out bag. 

“Sweet and Sour Pork!”

  
  


-

  
  


The two boys were sitting at Renjun’s back porch, sharing the big takeout container of food.

“Oh, I almost forgot.” Chenle pulled a few pieces of paper from the back of his pocket and handed them to Renjun. He knew from the blue paper that they were from Lucas.

“He kept writing the notes...in case you showed up to school. I figured I should give them to you.”

Renjun smiled gently. He opened one randomly.

“ _Wrapped in your arms, I swear I’d die._

_For your love, your love, I’m a better, better man.”_

_♪ Better Man - 5 Seconds Of Summer_

_I prepared a few gifts for your birthday. I hope I get to give them to you in person. I’m becoming a better man every day for you, because you deserve the best._

_\- Your boy_

Renjun probably would’ve cried if he were in the privacy of his room, but in front of Chenle he held it in. 

“Thank you, Chenle. I’ll put these with the rest.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Several days later_

  
  


Renjun woke up to an onslaught of Happy Birthday texts. He was now nineteen years old. He smiled and jumped out of bed, running down the stairs to find balloons surrounding the dining table, which had pancakes sitting atop it. Both his parents gave him bone-crushing hugs before sitting down to eat.

They had been conversing as usual when they heard a knock at the door. 

“I’ll get it,” his mother said, already up and walking towards their front door. Renjun paid no mind and just continued to eat his pancakes that he had drowned in syrup.

“Good morning, Huang-tàitai!”

Renjun hadn’t heard that voice in weeks. His heart stopped when he turned around in his chair and was met with Lucas, grinning from ear to ear. 

“Hi, Mr. Huang...Mrs. Huang too. I’d like to take this moment to properly introduce myself. I’m Wong Yukhei, your son’s _boyfriend_.”

It was way too fucking early for this.

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to steal Renjun for a little while. There are some things I have to fix.”

It felt like a fever dream. Before Renjun could say anything, his parents were both vehemently agreeing. His mother gave him a little shove to get him to stand up. And as he turned to leave the table, his father grabbed his wrist. When he turned back to look at him, he just received a warm smile and a pat on the back. Renjun returned the smile before slowly walking towards the lanky boy standing in their dining room.

Lucas reached for Renjun’s hand, and Renjun let those long fingers of his engulf his hand, dragging him out of the house. 

Then they were standing on his front porch Renjun awkwardly picking at his fingernails as he waited for Lucas to speak.

“Happy Birthday, Renjun. Just seeing you in front of me...it feels like it’s _my_ birthday.”

Renjun stayed silent and bit his lip, tasting the syrup still on his mouth.

“I wanted to tell you this in person...I came out to my friends. And told them I was in a relationship with an amazing boy.” Renjun’s heartbeat stuttered. “They all want to meet you.”

“Wow...I’m- I’m so proud of you, Yukhei.” Lucas gave him a smile sweeter than the syrup on his lips. Before he could stop himself, he was telling Lucas everything. “I’m so sorry if I made you feel pressured. I never wanted to make you feel bad for being scared. I understand your feelings and-”

“Renjun, baby, _I’m_ the one who should be saying sorry. For making you feel like I was ashamed of you. You are the most important person to me, truly.” Lucas took both his hands in his. “After all of this, I finally realized that you deserve to be shown off, and I’m going to do just that. Having someone like you loving me...that’s enough to make me not care about what others think.”

Renjun wrapped his arms around the tall boy’s waist, face pressed against his solid chest. Lucas in return wrapped an arm around his waist and rested his other hand on the tiny head leaning on him. He had missed this feeling. 

“Can I give you your present now?”

“Yes, but hurry up because my special Birthday pancakes are gonna get cold.”

Lucas laughed and took a box out of his back pocket. It looked familiar, and when he opened the box, he realized why. It was his couple bracelet, repaired and good as new.

“I found it in the grass. Was hoping you’d want it again.”

“Holy shit! Thank you so much, I thought it was gone for good. I can’t believe I was such a drama queen.”

“I probably would’ve done the same thing. Now for part two of your gift…” Lucas started unzipping his hoodie. Pulling it off, Lucas now stood in front of him wearing a white t-shirt that complimented his tan skin perfectly. How does he look so perfect in just a plain t-shirt? Renjun looked on nervously.

“Birthday sex? On my porch?!”

“No, dummy.” And then he turned around, revealing writing on the back of the shirt.

_‘I have a boyfriend’_

“So no more girls try flirting with me when I go out.”

“You’re so fucking stupid. I love you.” Renjun grabbed one of his shoulders and spun the boy around, pressing their lips together before he could even catch his balance.

Lucas let his hands settle on the other boy’s waist as tiny hands ran through his hair. The kiss tasted like pancakes. Renjun kissed him with fervor, Lucas getting lost in the feeling of those soft lips he missed oh so much. Suddenly Renjun pulled away slightly, and Lucas heard him whisper…

“Flo Milli shit.”

“Wh-” 

“Sorry, I can hear it playing from your car.”

They both laughed, hands never moving from where they had settled.

“It’s fuckin- my iPhone automatically connects to my stereo and starts playing some random shit I have in my library.”

“So you have Flo Milli in your library…”

“And what about it?!”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_Two months later_

The last week of senior year, everyone stops putting in effort, mentally already graduated. Renjun included.

He pressed his phone’s home button to check the time, screen lighting up with a photo of him and his beautiful boyfriend smiling at the camera. 

3:00

Only five more minutes until the bell rang. 

3:01

He slumped over in his chair, exhausted from a long day of doing jack shit.

3:02 

He scratched his chest, feeling a pain as he dragged his nails over one of the hickies there.

3:03

One kid started packing up, everyone else taking that as their queue to do the same.

3:04

As he zipped up his backpack, he could hear the teacher saying something about an assignment that no one would end up doing.

3:05

The bell rang and Renjun was the first out the classroom door. He walked quickly through the halls, squirming his way past people as he made his way to the front entrance. As he pushed open the doors, he looked towards the parking lot and immediately saw his boyfriend leaning against his car (adorning a bisexual pride flag sticker right in the middle of its bumper), smiling once he met Renjun’s eyes. 

Renjun ran into the older boy’s arms, letting himself literally be swept off his feet and spun around. 

“How was your day, babe?”, he asked as he set the tiny boy down.

“Fine, better now that I’m with you,” he responded, making his way around to the passenger seat. After they both got in the car, Lucas let his hand fall upon the other’s thigh.

“What are you craving right now? Let’s go grab a bite to eat.”

“You,” Renjun said cheekily.

“Well, I’m right here.” Lucas was shut up by Renjun leaning over to kiss him deeply. He felt the boy’s tongue prying at his lips and smiled. “It hasn't even been a minute and you’re already all over me.”

Renjun didn’t respond. He did however climb over to straddle the taller boy, seating himself in his lap and connecting their lips again. Lucas felt the pressure of a hand on his crotch and pulled away.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting my bite to eat,” Renjun grinned, punctuating the sentence by biting down on one of the boy’s collarbones. Lucas moaned slightly, letting his hands roam over Renjun’s back.

“Hey, could I get a ride...WHAT THE FUCK?!” Chenle’s screech could probably be heard by everyone in the parking lot.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


_June_

  
  


“Congratulations, my smart boy,” Lucas pulled him in by his graduation gown and kissed him briefly.

“My parents are watching!”, Renjun warned him. Lucas looked over his head to wave at the married couple. 

“Babe, I have a surprise for you.” Renjun stole his attention right back.

“What is it?”

Renjun pulled out an envelope from his pocket, handing it over. Lucas didn’t bother reading it, taking the contents out immediately. He opened the piece of paper that was inside and was met with the crest of the college he was going to attend. 

“ _Dear Renjun Huang:_

_It is with great pleasure that I inform you that you have been accepted-”_

He stopped reading and looked up with wide eyes at the expecting boy in front of him.

“You...you’re going to the same college as me?”

Renjun looked a bit scared at the reaction. “Yeah...I figured that it would be good-”

“It is! It’s more than good! It’s amazing!” Lucas hugged him as tight as he could.

“Yukhei- I can’t...breath-,” Renjun wheezed out, Lucas loosening his hold and opting to hold the boy’s face instead. 

“I love you so much, Huang Renjun,” Lucas whispered, staring down at the beautiful man whose face he was cradling.

“And I love you back, Wong Yukhei.”


End file.
